Today I woke up feeling so grey. There was no particular reason. Maybe just the situation. ⁣This has to be the only piece in this series that I don’t like. But this how I felt today. So it showed on the canvas too.
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Somehow was feeling tired of following a routine to be productive. But then not doing something ‘productive’ also bothers me. ⁣
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Can’t go out freely, without a worry . I used to pride myself in being a homebody but it has started to get to me. Maintaining your health, watching what you are eating . Trying to finish pending work, doing a course , creating art are all things I have chosen to do myself but it used to work much better in conjunction with a well deserved break in the outside world. Without that it feels as if I am a prisoner of my own thoughts and rules.⁣
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One of my art teachers, a very profound one once said “ boring is good. Imagine if you have cancer how unstable your life would be.” I was aghast at his example, but in away it’s true. I am grateful that I can be in a place without any worry other than my curtailed freedom and boredom. There are so many unfortunate people battling so many worries and issues at the moment. It really puts things into perspective. ⁣
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I am someone who always got bored very easily even as a child. But that means I have had it comfortable with no real hardcore worries. ⁣
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Learning different shades of gratefulness one day at a time.